Take A Good Look At Yourself

 John 12: 20 - 33

Among those who went up to worship at the festival were some Greeks. They came to Philip, who was from Bethsaida in Galilee, and said to him, ‘Sir, we wish to see Jesus.’ Philip went and told Andrew; then Andrew and Philip went and told Jesus. Jesus answered them, ‘The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified. Very truly, I tell you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains just a single grain; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. Those who love their life lose it, and those who hate their life in this world will keep it for eternal life.

Whoever serves me must follow me, and where I am, there will my servant be also. Whoever serves me, the Father will honor.

‘Now my soul is troubled. And what should I say—“Father, save me from this hour”? No, it is for this reason that I have come to this hour. Father, glorify your name.’

Then a voice came from heaven, ‘I have glorified it, and I will glorify it again.’

The crowd standing there heard it and said that it was thunder. Others said, ‘An angel has spoken to him.’ Jesus answered, ‘This voice has come for your sake, not for mine. Now is the judgment of this world; now the ruler of this world will be driven out. And I, when I am lifted up from the earth, will draw all people to myself.’ He said this to indicate the kind of death he was to die.

In this passage, Jesus says, “Those who love their life lose it, and those who hate their life in this world will keep it for eternal life.”  It’s always a shock to the spiritual system when Jesus uses the word ‘hate’ as he does a few times in the gospels. I wanted to know what he really meant by ‘hate’ so I looked up the Aramaic word for it. Turns out that there are several and the one that makes the most sense in the context of Jesus’ teachings is the word “sna”. You can pronounce that however you want as, funnily enough, I don’t speak Aramaic. Sna means, “To put to one side or set aside.”

“Those who hold on to their life lose it and those who set their own life to one side will gain eternal life.” Now that sounds more like the Jesus I know.

Lent is a good time to assess the state of your spiritual life but very often there is a common assumption that this kind of assessment means that what you’ll find are a lot of areas where you’ve fallen down on the job and maybe have become a bit lax. I contend that many people fail to appreciate where they have succeeded beautifully and they fail to discover the things they do that epitomize holiness. This kind of discovery and appreciation should not lead a person to say, “I’m fine. I don’t need to grow anymore.” It should lead a person to understand that there is much in their life that is worthy of being offered to the Father as gift and as holy sacrifice.

Few people see the holiness of what they do and go through on a daily basis.  Perhaps this is because all good people do what they do. But why would that diminish recognition of the holiness of their actions? Perhaps it’s a misconception of what holiness means. Holiness means, “Set aside for God – consecrated to God.” (Sna’d for God?) For example, most Catholic parents are serious about their faith and about raising their children to know and love God. How much more consecrated can one be? Holiness, as it pertains to us, doesn’t mean perfect. Think of a chipped and blemished clay cup. If a priest takes that cup, blesses it and sets it aside to hold the blood of Christ at the Eucharist, that cup becomes holy – intended for a special purpose. It is its special purpose that makes it holy, not its state of perfection. So parents following their vocation have a consecrated purpose. In order to fulfill that purpose, they sna, or set to one side, many things that might lead to self-fulfillment and self-satisfaction.

If you spent years at university studying for a career, you gave up numerous pleasures and desires to do so. If you go to work daily in order to house, feed and clothe a family, that means other personal desires and dreams have been set aside. If you and your spouse have brought children into the world, you made a commitment to set aside your life for sake of your children. Those are just a very few examples among many.

It is hard to ascribe holiness to a life that’s full of pressure, schedules and deadlines or to a life that’s immersed in dirty diapers, mounds of laundry, endless meals and chaotic noise. There is a romantic idea of a holy life, a term that brings to mind glowing saints praying and contemplating in lonely cells. Yes, Religious give up much to answer the call to their vocation - but so do you. It is time we all started seeing marriage and raising a family as a holy vocation equal to that of the Religious vocation. It is time we began to respect deeply the single working mother or father. It is time we stood in awe of those who have never married and have led a life dedicated to the Lord while living in a hard world and supporting themselves. We need to honor the couples with no children who often seem to end up in nurturing roles, welcoming various lost souls into theirs hearts and homes. There is no hierarchy of holiness in the Kingdom. Every person who sacrifices, every person who sets to one side their own self satisfaction and every person who struggles with growth, prayer and following the will of God is one who is enveloped in a holy life. The life of a Religious has different struggles, but certainly not better ones or harder ones.

I have to tell you that I am often overcome by a sense of holy respect when I hear of a mother working through a round of sickness in her children while being sick herself or when I see a busy student refusing to miss Mass and offering time to something like St. Vincent de Paul in spite of deadlines and looming exams. When I observe someone who has worked at a job for years and would love to retire but still needs to bring in money to provide for the family, I see a saint in the making. I see retired people giving of their time and resources to work in the church or volunteering to help their own adult children or assist those less able. I see holy grains of wheat falling to the ground and dying. I see lives and personal desires being set aside. I see it all the time – and so does the Lord.

Holiness abounds in the people of God and I am blessed to witness it. I am so full of gratitude sometimes for what people have set aside in order to bring life to others and in order to make sure the Lord is a part of their lives. When I witness this holiness I turn to the Father and I say, “Look at that, Father. Isn’t that beautiful?” and he says to me, “It fills my heart. I know what they have given up for me and I love them for it.” 

The two Greeks said to Philip, “Sir, we wish to see Jesus.” If those two men came to me today and said the same thing, I would reply, “Look at the ones who follow him without having seen him. Look for the sacrificing mothers and fathers who who go to the cross daily for their families. Look for the committed ones without partners, young and old, who follow with the single purpose of knowing his will. Look for the busy ones, the weary ones and the pressured ones who still take time to worship and have set aside their own dreams in order to follow God’s dream. Look for these people and you will find holiness. You will find Jesus.” 

“And I, when I am lifted up from the earth, will draw all people to myself.” This week, ponder on what you have set aside in your dreams and desires in order to follow Christ and your vocation. Bring these things to the Cross and know that he has drawn you to himself.

Blessed are you. Holy are you.