Water And Bread For The Wilderness

John 6: 51-58

 I am the living bread that came down from heaven. Whoever eats of this bread will live for ever; and the bread that I will give for the life of the world is my flesh.’ The Jews then disputed among themselves, saying, ‘How can this man give us his flesh to eat?’ So Jesus said to them, ‘Very truly, I tell you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood have eternal life, and I will raise them up on the last day; for my flesh is true food and my blood is true drink. Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood abide in me, and I in them. Just as the living Father sent me, and I live because of the Father, so whoever eats me will live because of me. This is the bread that came down from heaven, not like that which your ancestors ate, and they died. But the one who eats this bread will live for ever.’

When I was a child in Saskatchewan, every farm had a hand operated pump in the yard. In order to get the water flowing they had to prime the pump. They would pour water into the pump to improve the seal and then start pumping the handle. The part I remember best was waiting with thirsty impatience as someone vigorously moved the handle up and down, up and down. It seemed to take forever but suddenly the water would start gushing out. It was clear, cold, abundant and wonderful water on a hot dry Saskatchewan summer day.

In the last reflection, we looked at how crucial it is to keep a watch over our mouths and over the thoughts of our hearts and to build up habits of praise and gratitude rather than habits of judgment, grumbling and complaining. Speaking with gratitude and building up habits of positive trust in the Lord could be likened to spiritually “priming the pump”.  You receive the Bread of life in the Eucharist, in the Word and in community. Jesus the Bread, the Word and the water of life is deep within you just like the water was deep in the well on that hot dusty Saskatchewan farm. It was a fascinating mystery me that in order to get water to flow out of that pump, water had to be poured in first. In order for the water of the Spiritual life to begin to gush out of us, we need to pour water in. Practicing gratitude, hope and trust in the Lord is what primes our pumps. Eventually what will come out is a supernatural flow of grace. But you have to prime the pump. That’s your job.

Jesus keeps referring to the Jewish ancestors who received natural food and drink in a supernatural manner. He was saying that God can provide for his people and he can do it in a way that creates awe and wonder…for the moment. Time after time in the wilderness, the Father provided for his people in miraculous ways. They had food, meat, drink and healing provided in ways that no one could deny was the hand of a mighty God. But manna, quail and waters gushing out of a rock did not fill these people with an attitude of lasting gratitude and grace. As soon as their physical and emotional needs seemed to be unmet again, they immediately lost heart, became resentful and started complaining. They kept drying up spiritually. The desert was as much in their hearts as it was in the land around them. Their souls were howling wildernesses. The most they could come up with was ‘in the moment gratitude’ which faded away when the next set of difficult circumstances arose. Most of these people died in the wilderness without really understanding the true provision of God.

In the Gospel, Jesus said to the people, “…whoever eats me will live because of me.”  It seems so simple doesn’t it? If we go to Mass and receive the Eucharist, we should be full of the dynamic life of God but it often doesn’t feel much like it. Well, in fact, we are full of this life. The problem is getting it out of us. The life within us is like the water sitting deep in the well to which the pump is connected. It’s there and it has the capacity to nurture life. But it has to be brought to the surface. We have to prime the pump.

Do you want the grace of the body and blood of Christ to flow through you and out of you? Then prime your pump. Prime it with the music you listen to. Prime it with the people you spend the most time with. Prime it with scripture and spiritual books. But most of all prime it with the words of your mouth and the attitudes of your heart.

Our environment, whether it’s people or our physical environment, has a strong influence on how we feel and think but we also need to start seeing that our thoughts, attitudes, judgments and what comes out of our mouths are environments in themselves. We live within our thoughts and within what we speak. When we speak and think negativity we are creating a wilderness for ourselves to live in. There is no lush growth because there is no flowing water. There is no flowing water because the well is deep and the pump is rusty from disuse. 

A friend’s teen-aged daughter left a note asking her to buy her some nuts. Her little brother left an answering note: “You are what you eat…” I’d like to twist this around a little:

You eat what you are.

If negativity is what you constantly think and speak, this is the food you are feeding yourself, the food you are living on day by day. Then we can go back to the original maxim: you are what you eat. If you constantly feed yourself negative thoughts and self-judgments you will eventually become negativity personified. And so the circle goes. And so the wilderness grows.

You receive the bread of Christ but what kind of a constant diet are you feeding your inner self about your value and worth to the Lord? Do you say, “I am so bad. I am so stupid. I’m such a failure.”? Or do you say, “Thank you Father, for making me who I am. You are the magnificent Creator and you only create beauty. Help me to see myself as you see me and love myself the way you love me.”? Macrina Weiderkher, a Benedictine nun, once prayed "O God, help me to believe the truth about myself no matter how beautiful it is!" This, too, is bread that nourishes us for the journey.

“Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood abide in me, and I in them.”  Abiding is not meant to be a sporadic activity and if you confine ‘eating and drinking of me’ to just the reception of the wine and bread in the Eucharist, feeling like you’ve done your bit while filling the rest of your day with self-condemnation and negative thoughts, you aren’t really eating and drinking Christ. You are nibbling at him.  

Prime the spiritual pump. Change your inner diet. It isn’t complicated…just critical.