Now large crowds were traveling with
him; and he turned and said to them, ‘Whoever comes to me and does not hate
father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and even life
itself, cannot be my disciple. Whoever does not carry the cross and follow me
cannot be my disciple. For which of you, intending to build a tower, does not
first sit down and estimate the cost, to see whether he has enough to complete
it? Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who
see it will begin to ridicule him, saying, “This fellow began to build and was
not able to finish.” Or what king, going out to wage war against another king,
will not sit down first and consider whether he is able with ten thousand to
oppose the one who comes against him with twenty thousand? If he cannot, then,
while the other is still far away, he sends a delegation and asks for the terms
of peace. So therefore, none of you can become my disciple if you do not give
up all your possessions.
It is a shock to our spiritual systems
when Jesus uses the word ‘hate’. In this day and age where hate can be a legal
crime and we are so aware of the terrible consequences of hate in society and
in our personal lives, to read about Jesus encouraging us to hate our fathers, mothers, husbands, children, brothers and sisters feels terribly harsh
and wrong. It doesn’t seem very Christ like and it is difficult to know how to
respond to it.
Knowing that the modern English
translations of some words in the bible end up to be not exactly true to the
original meaning and intention of the speaker, especially if the speaker was of
a completely different time and culture, I decided to see if I could find the original
Aramaic word for ‘hate’ and see if our modern definitions square up with what
Jesus was really saying. What I discovered was that the Aramaic word for hate
is ‘sna’.
Oddly enough, I don’t actually speak
Aramaic – so I have no idea as to the pronunciation of the word ‘sna’ but what I discovered about this word is that it has five meanings and
the only meaning that made any sense at all in the context of what Jesus was
saying in this Gospel was the definition, “to put to one side”. Within that
definition, Jesus is not urging us to despise and shun the people who are
closest to us or anyone at all. In the context of this whole Gospel passage,
Jesus is speaking about priorities and explaining that if we choose to follow
him, it’s not a choice that allows for a halfhearted commitment to be complied
with only if it’s convenient or if it doesn’t cost too much. It’s also a choice
that calls for much clarity and lightness of being. By lightness of being I
mean not being so burdened with possessions that it’s impossible to move when
the Spirit says move.
In the last verse, Jesus says, “So
therefore, none of you can become my disciple if you do not give up all your
possessions.” Give up. Sna. Set to one side. I love the image of
setting something to one side because it feels like gentle detachment. It’s not
an act of loathing or of throwing something in the garbage or of complete rejection; it is simply an act
of saying, “Excuse me. My attachment to you is in my way and I can’t see Jesus.
I’m just going to move you over here.” Either it's a matter of moving someone
or something just off to the side or else moving ourselves into a position so we can
keep the Master in sight. It’s detaching from the possessions we have, human or
otherwise, in order to behold Jesus more clearly. Detachment is an ongoing
exercise of simply keeping our sight lines clear.
The definition of what we possess and
hang onto in a way that blocks our view of Jesus is going to be different for
each one of us and a continual discernment of what these things are is
important to a vibrant spiritual life. This discernment, by the way, will take
the rest of your life. Detachment is a journey not a one-time act and as you
grow in the spiritual life, you will find that you detach yourself from one thing
and suddenly find yourself too attached to something else. We are all a bit
like possession magnets.
For some, the vision blockers will be
material possessions that require constant maintenance and updating. Others might
not be so concerned about material things but find that they have gradually
taken possession of children, partners or friends in such an unhealthy way that
peace and trust in God’s provision and saving power is lost. Others are deeply
possessive of their dogmas, rules and regulations. We all possess strong
opinions on certain issues and it’s a matter of pride that we won’t give an
inch, not one inch, even when compassion is called for, not righteousness or
rightness. Many are very attached to their roles, ministries and territories
within a parish community and aren’t aware of the subtle moment when defending
their territory has become more important to them than what they were
originally called to do and who it was that called them. Some people are deeply
possessive of their fears or their disappointments and frustrations and find it
difficult to let them go or forgive.
Everyone possesses dreams and desires –
many of them worthy and good until they make the present moment lose its good
taste. When we are trying to control everything in our lives, when we have
plans, desires, dreams and expectations and when we feel it is up to us to control
people and circumstances to make everything fit into our visions, we will find
that eventually we are bogged down, slogging along in a desert without making
any headway. Even when the plans and desires seemed to be initiated by God, our
innate tendency is to try to make it all happen the way we think it should all happen. The responsibility of creating, controlling and maintaining our own lives is a
very heavy possession, one that obscures the vision of Christ. How can you
follow him when you can’t even see him?
In other words, there is nothing in our
lives, spiritual or secular, that cannot become a possession that has the potential
of getting in the way of beholding Jesus. Possessions complicate life and
obscure the simplicity of love and if we look very closely we will see that the
one who grabs on to possessions and guards them fiercely is the false self. It
needs control and possessions make it feel in control.
What Jesus knew when he told us to
‘sna’ our possessions was that once we lose sight of him and lose a sense of
our relationship to him, false self becomes afraid and then spiritual
understanding becomes distorted. When false self’s spiritual understanding
becomes distorted it’s hard for us to know who we are and more importantly, we
forget who Christ really is. We forget the full beauty of his love. We spend
more time with words of fear, resentment, complaint, discouragement and
dissatisfaction than we do with words of trust, gratitude, praise and love.
“…none of you can become my disciple if you do not
give up all your possessions.” That sounds like a
strict and cold ultimatum but try hearing it this way: “Beloved, if you are weighed down by all that you cling to and all that
clings to you, it will be impossible for you to follow me because you won’t be
able to see me and you will forget what I look like. Eventually you won’t be
quite so eager to come close to my heart because you’ll be afraid of me, afraid
of my love and afraid that letting go will cause you to bleed more than you already do. When you’re burdened by possessions, the evil one tells you that I am to
be feared, that you are not valuable, that you are unlovable, a failure and
unlikable and that your life is a mess. When you cannot see my eyes, you will
believe him. Yes, it costs much to follow me and to keep me close to you but it
will cost far more to lose sight of me. If you cannot see my face and see the
love pouring out of me for you, you have nothing at all and all your
possessions are like dust in the hot, dry wind.”
The wondrous thing is he never goes
ahead and leaves us alone to struggle in isolation with all our possessions. He
is there, patiently waiting to help us unload and set aside our burdens so that
we can behold him and he can behold us, face to face in freedom and love. He
wants us to detach simply because he is lonely for our love and because he
knows that we will die without his.
There is no God like him.
Take, Lord, receive, all I have and possess.
You have given all to me; now I return it. Give me only your love and your
grace. That’s enough for me.
(From the Suscipe, prayer of St. Ignatius.)
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